THE COLOSSUS

For the last 6 months I have been constantly harassed by one topic which I always cherished but had not the courage to take up and have been postponing or rather eluding to pen since no pen could ever reflect the personality of the MAN who dwells within me and also left an ever lasting imprint on everybody who had come his way .No words could ever capture his spirit ;hence the enormity of the job at hand frightens me, lest I fail. Of what use the English I have learnt if I cannot introduce this giant to my sons and the generations to follow. But will I be able to do it, atleast bring out 10% of his true nature? No I have my self doubts ,but with his blessings what can I not achieve,hence this already doomed attempt .
One evening I don’t exactly recollect when ,when Meena chithy visited me and in the course of a very lively chit chat she suddenly asked me " Do you remember APPA "?. That one epithet shot like a thunderbolt and I was taken aback .Chithy as usual went on speaking I knew not what .I left my seat and went to the terrace and stared at the beautiful evening sky, my eyes dotted with a droplet of what you call" tear" which I had forgotten long ago . My chest heaved up and down, the beginning of a long forgotten art of weeping . Through my foggy eyes I could see the haze of a retreating sun and the birds returning home .Like them I retreated to my HOME 50 years back leaping to my unforgettable childhood at Kollam where the great MAN aboded .
He was my maternal grand father all right, as for as the relationship that the society accepts . But for all of us he was our beloved APPA the one and only APPA that I can accept . and boast of .
In fact he was very tall ,very very tall for a child of around 4 or 5 , broad shouldered rather a dull reddish in hue ,upright and presented a clean picture of what you may term as "stability" in its core , for his sixtyish image with a personality the trade mark of which was a silken glistening elegant baldness which was any mans envy sitting atop a face glorified by his long nose and deep looking eyes and broad forehead. But for a child his sixth finger alongside the thumb was an added attraction .His favourite place was his easy chair which almost blended with his back .Don’t be under the mistaken notion that he was a retired I.A.S. officer or a professional or a teacher for that matter not even a shrewd businessman but a simple cloth trader who knew not the tricks of the trade rather he was not too bothered about it .May be he had more of an agriculture back ground and knew enough to read and write and had no university degree to boast of .-Cutting it short he was a SIMPLE UNADULTERATED MAN and he knew only one thing , nothing much to cheer about,rather it is now a days, seen as a vice or weakness, the one and only dying art in the world The ART OF LOVING .He was a master at it and gave enough and more till we drowned in it ,infact he would have scolded me for using that word" drown" since he loathed all forms of mental injury to another human being whether in words or deeds .He was the Great BANYAN Tree under which we flowered .
As a child I used to eagerly watch his daily schedule and what attracted me greatly was his morning shave ,the way he used to puff his lips to shave the whitish shooting moustache and I wanted to grow immediately to manhood so I can perform this great art . Then after the bath he used to adorn his face with sandal mix in his broad forehead in the form of an U with a thin sleek piece of wood peering closely in the mirror correcting the shape to order in a time which lasted eternity ,but was worth watching anyway .During breakfast I was given the pride of place along side him and the soft iddlies which Kuppuchi mami manufactures with the coconut chutney which he usually smears over the idly liberally and then deliberately squeezing deep in to the belly of the idly before eating it , is enough to set my salivary glands in full throttle .Even now once in a while when nobody is watching I try to emulate him .Then he sets off to his clothes shop which smells sweetly to me of the new calico clothes ,in his totally white mundu and shirt with a long sleek robe around his neck reeking in the nobility in him and off he goes in Raghavans cycle rickshaw . In the night when he returns I am eagerly waiting for him like a dog to hear his commanding voice "Konthe! Thoongiyacha? Which lullabies me to sleep,sometimes he fetches me appams from some temple .
I am totally at ease in his laps,so to say in bliss in half sleep twiddling with his extra thumb in his left arm or is it his right arm ? He never adviced me nor tells me the mythological stories {it was meena chithies turn to soar me to magical heights with her stories and the Montecristos ,the Draculas ,the Three musketeers [ATHOS ,POTHOS ,ARAMIS,DEARTEGNANS],}.When ever he was in great mood he used to sing me the Thandavakkone song .He pampered me like hell much to the discomfort of Mani mama and we were bitter enemies trying to get his attention .Life was worth living those days in the company and pettings of Janakichithy,Meena chithy ,Rajumama and Manimaama though he often pinched my ears when A ppa was far away . Yes I will give a fortune if I can relive those haunting eras .,with "Krisshna ,Mukunda murare " playing in the background from the Rathna theater in the evenings before start of the first show .
I have never seen him really angry and he taught me that life was all about GIVING and not taking ,to ENDURE at times ,to RESIGN at some other times ,to CELEBRATE most of the times but never to RESIST it . He never told me so, since sermonizing was anathema to him and he never passed judgement nor criticized anybody . HE taught us to love all and be loved .,to believe in all and to give shelter when ever they needed and showed us Money was a means and not an end in itself . HE was LOVE INCARNATE AND WILL ALL WAYS BE IN OUR HEARTS IF EVER THERE IS ANY TINGE OF LOVE LEFT IN US.
I know I have failed in my attempt to capture his personality to my readers,but yet I have tried my level best and atleast I can boast of a great grand dad I was privileged to have.Yes if if he was alive today he would have allowed me to curl on his laps and weep, weep till eternity .